A  P o s i t i v e,  O b j e c t i v e,

I n f o r m a t i v e   D i s c u s s i o n

Copyright 2003 by Wendell H. Hall
ISBN 0-9716324-6-6
A publication of
Great Adventure 2000

The Angel Moroni, last surviving ancient American Nephite, blows his trumpet atop Mormon temples. Mormons are segregationists. They disdain to display the cross. "We should not dwell on Christ's* agony and death," they say, "but on his glorious resurrection." Does it occur to them that no cross, no resurrection?

The cross is recognized everywhere as the symbol of Christianity, but these true ones opt to distance themselves from other Christians by exiling the symbol of Christ's sacrifice. In so doing, they segregate others from themselves as the one true, exclusive, grex of the Lord. Segregate derives from Latin se (apart) and grex (flock); i.e., to set apart from the flock. (The genitive of grex is gregis.)

*Was our Lord a Greek? "Xristos" (which became Christ in English, Cristo in Italian and Spanish, Christus in German, etc.) is a Greek translation of Hebrew Meshiach, which means "the anointed one"—transliterated to English as Messiah, Messias in German, Mesías in Spanish, Messie in French, etc.

Did Peter say, "Thou art the Christ"? (Matthew 16:16) Of course not. No Israelite would ever say such a thing. He said, "Thou art the Messiah." This is just one more example of the perverse anti-Jewish prejudice that afflicts society.

Also, the correct transliteration of his given name is not Jesus but Yeshua. These proper appellations have more, softer syllables than the traditional ones and are phonetically unsuitable as expletives. Their usage could curb blasphemous cursing somewhat.

Proper names should be transliterated, never translated. Hispanic Americans may render Hall as Vestíbulo but only as a joke, always reverting to something sounding like "Hole" in serious conversation.

"If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it." (John 14:14, spoken to His disciples, then and now—hopeful, faithful, charitable ones) And if you don't do this, employing instead an incorrect, improper, Greek-derived substitute insolently and shamelessly supplanting it? He is merciful... but feel you no shame? How deep ought to be your embarrassment! An offense not only to Him but to the Chosen People, the only non-pagans on earth back then, who gave the world the prophets and their scriptures—the only ones among whom His mission on earth could be performed.

No big deal? It definitely is. We should love the Lord with all our heart, soul, strength and mind. Messiah, Messiahns, Messiahity, and Messiah Day are the appropriate terms and, except in quotations, will be given preference on this website. Messiah Day, not Messiahmas. Mas, meaning mass, has Catholic connotations and therefore lacks universality.

Yeshua, Name of Wondrous Love

                                        Yeshua!  Name of wondrous love!
                                        Name all other names above!
                                        Unto which must every knee
                                        bow in deep humility.

                                        Yeshua!  Name decreed of old,
                                        to the maiden mother told,
                                        kneeling in her lowly cell,
                                        by the angel Gabriel.

                                        Yeshua!  Name of priceless worth
                                        to the fallen sons of earth,
                                        for the promise that it gave,
                                        Yeshua shall his people save.

                                        Yeshua!  Name of mercy mild,
                                        given to the holy Child
                                        when the cup of human woe
                                        first he tasted here below.

                                        Yeshua!  Only Name that's given,
                                        under all the mighty heaven,
                                        whereby man, to sin enslaved,
                                        burst his fetters and is saved.

William Walsham Howell, 1854                                        

Music:  Wendell Herbert Hall, 2000                                        
as played on his Casio keyboard                                        


As an infantryman in World War II, I participated in the liberation of the six concentration camps ringing Landsberg, Germany and also, at war's end, the incredibly atrocious one at Dachau. Since then, I have been a fierce defender of the Jews. Calling our Savior by the Greek name Christ is a perverse manifestation of anti-Semitism. Praying in the name of the Messiah, we acknowledge his Jewishness and indirectly pay homage to the great chosen people who gave us the Old and New Testaments, including, of course, the prophecies regarding His first and second comings. Yeshua has replaced Howe's Jesus here. Howe's work is in the public domain.

The assertion made by many that Mormons are not Christians deeply grieves them. A very simple decision by the hierarchy could somewhat change that: Display the cross and cease proclaiming to be the only true followers of Christ. Another positive step would be for them to sing "The Old Rugged Cross" and include it in their hymn books. If you would like to view the words and sing along with a great midi, click here. To listen to the music only, click below.

Can you imagine? The imagined likeness of a mere angel taking away the place of the glorious emblem of our Messiah, Master, Teacher and Redeemer! "But God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ..." (Galatians 6:14)

Yet Mormons purblindly prorate this high honor not to the Lord, in memory of his excruciating suffering for us on the cross, but to an ancient white American Indian that—according to them—flew through the midst of heaven having the everlasting gospel to preach unto them that dwell on the earth... (Revelation 14:6:7).

How come the white Indian's loud voice wasn't heard world-wide? That's merely figurative. But before that awesome flight takes place, the Lamb will stand on mount Sion, and with him an hundred forty and four thousand (Revelation 14:1). Careful now. No scripture is of any private interpretation (2 Peter 1: 20), except by us, of course. Can we put the cart before the horse? Naturally! No problem!

Undeterred, open-eyed,

unhobbling your hopes,

let nothing block you from learning,

expanding your capacity thereby

to choose the best paths.

Our DNA is not a done deal

but a work in process—

so intended by our Creator

in his gift to us of free agency.

As your promoter genes

switch opportunely on,

learn on and on—

wherever, what, when, or how you can.

                                           —Wendell Hall

Let him know,

that he which converteth

the sinner

from the error

of his way

shall save a soul

from death,

and shall hide

a multitude of sins.

                    —James 5:20

Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. (Romans 14:22. Everyday English translation)

Faith is not an unsupported, irrational hope... but trust in what we have every reason to believe is true. (Ray C. Stedman, On Paul's Epistle to the Romans)

The whole structure of the system was aimed at preventing conflicts of conscience from even arising. The result was the total sterility of all conversations and discussions among these like-minded persons. (Albert Speer, Inside the Third Reich)

A foolish faith in authority is the worst enemy of truth. (Albert Einstein)

The following observations about Mormonism are extracted from a novel by Wendell Hall. To help the medicine go down, they were embedded in a work of fiction intended to provide stimulating reading. The excerpt about Mormons begins as Dr. Eduardo Pérez, a linguist, is commenting on how vocal qualification (our "tone of voice") is used to attack, intimidate, jolly or honey others to our point of view against all facts, logic, and common sense. Excerpts from the novel, Miss Universe Alice, may be viewed and downloaded from nuspel.org. The excerpt is from the chapter cited.

Even worse, to a linguist, is what Ed has termed the ad vocem fallacy. (Pronounce it vok'm. O.K., Latinists, wok'm, if you insist.) Those with the most highly developed vocal qualification tend to win out. On the one hand, we have those who venomously hiss, "Mean-spirited!" in the meanest tone imaginable, stressing their point with the meanest of visages—like the political advisor sometimes referred to as "the Snake". Abraham Lincoln averred in response to a criticism of his criticism of an opponent's physiognomy, "Any man over 30 is responsible for his phiz," or words to that effect. How old is old Snake? Abe wasn't considered at all good-looking in his younger years. He even grew a beard, it is said, to cover up his "ugliness" somewhat. But we love his looks now. Looks of kindness, nobility, greatness.

On the other hand, just as bad and more insidious is the sanctimonious vox. "What we are saying is expressed in such mellifluous, honey-dripping tones, we cannot possibly be mistaken. Our voices establish our reasonable, natural, divinely decreed dominance over you. Sancti, Sancti, Sanctimonious, Sancti, Sancti, Sancti-money-us, Sancti, Sancti, Sancti-only-us be our name." As it offloads unctuous virtue on us, this vox can also tremble and quaver.

Did you take note of the redundancies? (Mellifluous comes from the Latin word for honey. Cf. the following: Latin mel, Spanish miel, Italian mele, French miel, Portuguese mel—all meaning honey. Mel plus fluere, to flow = mellifluous.) Redundant, yes, but imparting emphasis. Some teachers of English think that language = logic. "Fuzzy" logic, yes. (Characterized by Pérez as "a modified vision of precision decreed by degrees of inclusion and exclusion which include simplistic black-or-white, either/or, on/off, 1 or 0 as just one single possibility in a complex real world of infinite more or less"). These English grammar teachers say, "Don't never use a double negative because it's not logical." (Just kidding!) Ain't got no lovin' is illogical? Emphatically, it's absolutely logical! Sadly, tragically, in this utterance.

Sancti comes from Latin sanctus, holy. Holy derives from Old English halig (akin to German heilig): sound, whole, happy; used in Old English as a translation for Latin sanctus. Hale (sound in body, vigorous and healthy—usually applied to the old) is an offshoot of this.

This is not a blanket condemnation of sweet and trembling voices. Of course not. We need many more of them—genuinely dulcet and honest. This is aimed at those who as the only true purveyors of truth would blank out independence of thought. (You might be disfellowshipped. You could be excommunicated. Shunned. Ostracized. Not allowed to speak. You could lose your standing in the community, an employment opportunity, clients, a promotion, your job.) It also takes aim at mellifluous, sophistical scholars who labor to provide legs to stand on, zealously fabricating prosthetic limbs to prop up said only true purveyors of truth once and for all time.

A case in point: Tireless scholarly seeking for biblical, linguistic, cultural, historical and archaeological evidence that Native Americans are descendants of highly literate Israelites. (Prior inhabitants—the "Jaredites"— were destroyed from off the face of the land.) An ancient inscription that could be in Hebrew is discovered in Tennessee! One dubious inscription from two vast continents. A glorious find!

Oh, ye great scholars, have ye never heard of glottochronology, the study of how languages change and at what rate? If, in "probably about 589 B.C.," ancient Americans once spoke Hebrew, then most, if not all Native American languages would be sister languages, just as Italian, Sardinian, French, Spanish, Portuguese-Galician, Catalonian, Rumanian, and Romansh descend from one mother tongue: Latin. They are called Romance Languages—all going back to Rome. No training in glottochronology is required to easily see and hear that they all branched off from the same primeval language.

Linguistics is one of the more recently developed sciences; nonetheless, a book written in the early 1800s that had the American Indians speaking Hebrew or anything resembling it would all too obviously be fake—pure fiction not one tiny bit in accord with the facts. This would not do, so it is stated that "the Hebrew hath been altered by us.... and none other people knoweth our language...." (Mormon 9:33-34 in the Book of Mormon)

That is reasonable enough; however, it could not have been altered beyond all recognition, and many American Indian languages would reveal a common Hebrew heritage, just as the following tongues can all be classified as Indo-European in origin: Persian, Gujarati, Hindi, Bengali, etc. as examples of the Indo branch, and from the European branch, Celtic (Welsh, Gaelic, Breton, etc.), Germanic (English, Dutch, German, Danish, Norwegian, Swedish, etc.), Latin (Italian, French, Spanish, Portuguese, etc.), Balto-Slavic (Latvian, Lithuanian, Russian, Bulgarian, Serbo-Croation, etc.), Greek (only one surviving branch). Verified relationships go back beyond 1000 B.C.

At least 150 separate Native American language families have been identified, each of which required thousands of years to become distinct and for different family members to develop from them. There is no Semitic family among them—nothing resembling Hebrew at all. Further, in Mormon 9:32, it is stated: "And now, behold, we have written this record according to our knowledge, in the characters which are called among us the reformed Egyptian, being handed down and altered among us, according to our manner of speech." There is not one trace of an offshoot of Egyptian either—be it recalcitrant or reformed.

More appalling than the linguistic leg—nothing whatsoever to stand on there—is the ethnic one. Instead of light-skinned, comparatively hairy, bearded Semites, Columbus found dark-skinned, relatively hairless natives who in nothing resembled the Children of Israel. How come? Because, though formerly "white and exceeding fair and delightsome," God had cursed them. Yes, read all about it in the Book of Mormon, 2 Nephi 5:19-23.
And behold, the words of the Lord had been fulfilled unto my brethren, which he spake concerning them, that I should be their ruler and their teacher. Wherefore, I had been their ruler and their teacher, according to the commandments of the Lord, until the time they sought to take away my life.

Wherefore, the word of the Lord was fulfilled which he spake unto me, saying that: Inasmuch as they will not hearken unto thy words they shall be cut off from the presence of the Lord. And behold, they were cut off from his presence.

And he had caused the cursing to come upon them, yea, even a sore cursing, because of their iniquity. For behold, they had hardened their hearts against him, that they had become like unto a flint; wherefore, as they were white, and exceeding fair and delightsome, that they might not be enticing unto my people the Lord God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them.

And thus saith the Lord God: I will cause that they shall be loathsome unto thy people, save they shall repent of their iniquities.

And cursed shall be the seed of him that mixeth with their seed; for they shall be cursed even with the same cursing. And the Lord spake it, and it was done.
L.D.S. Article of Faith No. 2:
We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and not for Adam's transgression.
If consistency, congruence and integrity had their way, this Article of Faith would proclaim:
We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and not for Adam's transgression. We further believe that Native Americans will be punished for their own sins, and have been and will continue to be punished for Laman's and Lemuel's transgression, even with the sore cursing of skins of blackness and to be loathsome.
God, who is no respecter of persons (Acts 10:34), causes some of his children to be loathsome? And dark skins are a curse? Oh, no! How horrible! How ghastly!

What stark ungodly foolishness! So more than 86% of earth's human population, for no sins of their own, have been and are cursed with non-pale skins! And how—unaccountably, inexplicably—can those Goddamned loathsome little dark-skinned kids be so Godcursed cute and their parents so Goddamned good-looking?

Mormons earnestly proclaim that this ridiculous nonsense is the word of God (Article of Faith No. 9). What a dark, distorted, pernicious concept of Diety to harbor in their minds and hearts!

Anyone with two cents of common sense senses how preposterous this noxiousness is, yet true believers view anyone with the half ounce of good sense required to reject it as "blind and deaf to the truth, untouched by the Spirit, not yet ready to receive the revealed word," or—if separated from the fold—as "heretics, apostates, traitors, and rebellious renegades."

How account for docile acceptance of such sick pseudo-scriptural lunacy?
The principal promulgators—general authorities and missionaries—who compass sea and land, know how important it is to be earnest, abetted by clean good looks and serious attire.
Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye compass sea and land to make one proselyte, and when he is made, ye make him twofold more the child of hell than yourselves. (Matthew 23:15)

Children of hell? Harsh words! What characterizes these hellish ones? Above all (self-assured that they are above all), they are above examining and questioning their acquired attitudes, practices and beliefs. "Judge not, that ye be not judged." Judgment must be left to the Just Judge, but those so certain that they are prophets, seers, revelators, high priests and all the rest should be fully aware of the fact that the lot of imposters is dismal and grim and that they ought to be objective, dispassionate seekers after the Kingdom of Heaven—not closing their eyes and stopping up their ears for fear of seeing and hearing. To the extent that they follow the Savior's teachings, of course, they will be blessed accordingly—here and hereafter. The unfeigned sincerity of those so secure in their position up there above all, sadly, can captivate the unwary.

Earnestly endeavoring to be right and righteous, though in reality presumptuous fakes and imposters, the sheer folly of their exalted, grandiose grandstanding would sear these seers' souls could they but open their eyes and see the light.

When are these prophets who profit from the honor, respect, esteem and adulation of misguided, deceived, devout adherents of error going to recognize and admit that they are no more prophets than Everet M. Everyman? When are these seers going to open their eyes and see stark obstinate truths? When are these revelators going to revel in the intense, cleansing joy of opening their souls, hearts, and arms to the truth that makes them free?
When, among other shallow, inveigling enticements like the following, they employ a modicum of analytical and reasoning power: the alluring proclamation that Families are Forever—if all applicants are properly washed, anointed, endowed and sealed in holy Mormon temples, whether living or dead. So all human relationships formed and cherished on earth will be nullified, not remembered, not continued, unless certain precise gestures are made and rote phrases uttered—forever more significant and important than actual feelings and actions occurring over a lifetime! How Pharisaical to believe that the number of steps you take on the Sabbath and the precision with which you parrot back words and execute "signs and tokens" having nothing whatsoever to do with Christian doctrine and tradition are of any importance at all compared with doing your utmost to walk in the light you have sought and received.

Bearing your testimony to the truth of something makes it true! Testimonies are routinely challenged in judicial systems and experts are regularly brought before the courts to establish facts. False testimony (perjury) is severely punished. The Ninth Commandment reads: "Thou shalt not bear false witness." A sincere, steady, unwavering gaze and a serious, sober demeanor intended to communicate conviction will convict you if your inalterable assurance is untenable insubstantial. "Unshakeable" convictions (testimonies), unfortunately, can lead substantial numbers of the unwary astray.

Routine multitudinous raising of right arms to the square converts L.D.S. general authorities into apostles, prophets, seers and revelators as surely and conspicuously as the aurous sheen of a patina transforms base metals into gold. For sure, absolutely, definitely, and conclusively, not all that glitters is pure unalloyed ore, but it can dazzle the incautious and unwary.

Pray about it, and if you don't get it, it's because you didn't ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ. (Moroni 10:4)

Joseph Smith's use of King James English with its ye, thee, thou, thy, thine, willst, doth, hast, saith, cometh, spake, lo, behold, yea, go forth, hearken, and it came to pass, raise up seed, begat, etc. makes his books the Word of God... and true!

Mormonism imparts strong convictions which, though based on holy fictions, bring comfort and a sense of security to true blue believers.

Mormonism gets by by blindsiding—diverting attention away from vulnerabilities by appealing to our soft side—but excessive good will and efforts to be big-hearted and broad-minded can pull down opaque blinds on crystal-clear windows. Nice lacy curtains can obscure our view.
Don't dwell on the negative. Negativism is bad.

Mormonism is a positive force for good, decency, clean living, and eternal progress.

A small flaw here, a little weakness there, can be found in the best of things, so don't dwell on them.

Opening closet doors on musty old unimportant skeletons is unfair and inappropriate.

The wisdom of the wise shall perish. So-called intellectuals who think, for example, that Native Americans got their skins of blackness and are loathsome because of their Mongolian DNA, the climate, cosmic rays, or some other foolish notion are just totally blind to God's eternal truths revealed in these latter days.
Those who sacrifice a year or so of their life serving God without monetary compensation unquestionably have to be true servants of the Lord.

The power and prestige of America, which is triumphant and supreme.
The Garden of Eden was located in Missouri—to be precise, in Independence, MO.

Zion will be built on the American continent. (Article of Faith No. 10)

In actual fact, starting out in America in the 1830s, Zion has been built day by day by the pure in heart Latter-day Saints.

It was in America, way back between 559 and 545 B.C. (The Book of Mormon, 2 Nephi 10:3), centuries before he was born, that our Lord was called The Christ (from Greek) and "Christ" is still how he is known everywhere today, his Jewishness satisfactorily, perversely, and nearly universally, masked—notably by "his only true church," with its misconceived, misbegotten, Greek-based name: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The Messiah—most commonly in today's usage—is an opus by Handel sometimes heard and sung by some in some places once a year.

The gathering... To America, of course (meaning the U.S.A.). Where did those ancient Hebrew prophets get the idea that it would be to Jerusalem, in the Holy Land—now called Israel—and not to a town in Missouri? Well, all true Messiahns believe that the Hebrew prophets' words are divinely inspired, and in fulfillment of them (one of the greatest miracles of all times), the Jews are gathering to Israel and surviving, though surrounded by fanatic, mercilous enemies who are much more numerous and have far greater resources. What a marvelous work and a wonder!
Many inhabitants of other lands have believed that an an avenue to a better life can be foujnd in the U.S.A.—often true in the past and still today.

There is great interest world-wide in learning English and L.D.S. missionaries often teach it to get a foot in the door, so to speak.

Many thinking people are looking for a deeper meaning and purpose in life and deep-thinking Mormons will facilely outline and diagram this for you. No need to think things over overmuch. Rest assured. There's a memorized response to all your concerns.

The headiness of triumphalism... being the best, on the winning team, superior to others... is such a satisfying feeling it can account for the acceptance of lots of foolishness. Certainly, according to Mormons in general, other Christians can be O.K. but unfortunately they don't have the fullness of the gospel, the gospel in its restored purity and perfection.

Amazingly, this man's oldest, much esteemed and admired oldest brother, a famous scientist and inventor, once stated that truly good people just aren't found outside of Mormonism! Well, Kenneth L. Pike, this man's professor of Linguistics at the University of Michigan, a devout Christian, was unequaled in his service to mankind, making the words of our Lord available to millions throughout the world by creating writing systems for those who had none—personally and through his Phonemics: A System for Reducing Languages to Writing. And how about the Christian martyrs in many lands, faithful to the end, preferring to suffer and to die before forsaking their Messiah and Redeemer. How about that non-LDS neighbor, whose acts of caring, thoughtfulness, kindness and concern put us to shame? And how about great Christian writers like Bodie Thoene and Beverly Lewis, whose writings about the Messiah and how love of him transforms lives are so beautiful they bring tears to our eyes?

Being unique and highly favored by God feels good. In the whole wide world only the L.D.S. have living prophets, an extraordinary cause for exultation and self-congratulation. Observe them at General Conference time and you will agree that they are alive, and doing their best to look lively. Not only are they living prophets but living seers and revelators, too. Periodic unanimous votes with right hands uplifted to the square establish and confirm this fact.

Mormons are forward-looking. They believe in eternal progression. If they are properly endowed and sealed in holy Mormon temples, executing all the required signs and tokens accurately, and are true and faithful, they will become Kings and Queens, Gods and Godesses in the Celestial Kingdom. (Should they falter, repetitions are required of everyone in the session until the all-important words, "That will do" are uttered.)

Ending up in the peaceful, orderly Celestial Room, in which pure white decor and apparel rule, participants may, perhaps, reflect on the fact that "as man is, God once was; as God is, man may become." (Oft-repeated words of L.D.S. president Lorenzo Snow. He was a prophet, seer and revelator so his idiotic formulation has been treasured like precious pearls. You go, Snow! He told it like it is. Albert Einstein's critically important observation bears repeating: "A foolish faith in authority is the worst enemy of truth.") What a harvest of souls Mormons must make with sacred promises and words like this! Let's see. If God was once like us, at what age did He die? Sixty? Nine hundred? Then what? Thank you, Latter-day Saints, for this fabulous demystification of the concept of eternal, as in "Oh, God, the Eternal Father" (L.D.S. sacramental prayer)

There's more, but this should do it.
Our God of love, as conceived by Mormons and certain biblical literalists: Dark deeds > dark skins! For far too many misguided individuals: Dark skins > dark deeds! Only racists with no concern for societal disapproval and discord, as well as no fear of divine retribution, can believe such a stupid, ridiculous, evil thing.
"And just exactly what was Laman's and Lemuel's dark deed?"

"They didn't want to accept their younger brother Nephi as their ruler and teacher, as God had commanded! You can read about it in 2 Nephi 5:19."

"Did God command this with a loud voice from Heaven? Whose word do we have for this?"

"Why Nephi's, of course. This is one of the world's all-time great dramatic moral lessons and stories."

"So the moral is... All white, exceeding fair and delightsome older brothers had better heel like puppy dogs to the authority of a younger one (heeding voices from heaven or from the dark recesses of their younger brother's mind) for the sake of their children and all of their posterity forever, as well as for all those with whom they may mix their seed."

"Hey, hey! Come on! Don't be so extreme! Stick to the context! This is Scripture we've got here—for all practical purposes far above the level of DNA, hard science and the philosophies of men! Can you think of a better, more believable explanation for why Native Americans are loathsome and dark-skinned? The climate? Cosmic rays? Too much dark meat in their diet? Oh, yeah. Sure!

"And hold all your spitefulness right there! Everyone is aware of what good, charitable, honorable people Mormons are."

"Who's spiteful? I admire them for their good qualities. But feelings can't trump facts and they continue to trumpet the Book of Mormon as the word of God. All I've done is quote from it, verbatim. Of course it is constantly being revised. The day may finally come when they will have to officially admit that it's nothing but a work of fiction."
Despite the preponderance of darker skins on Earth, God seems to have an inordinate love of light ones. Curly hair also must be favored over the straight black hair of Native Americans and other unfortunates. A sore curse, indeed! DNA analysis indicates no traces of Israelite ancestry in Native Americans. See this URL, for example. If it has ceased to exist,* just search for "Native American DNA."

*For your convenience, the text is given below.

Native Americans, DNA and the Mormon Church
Tuesday September 14, 2004

A new book casts doubts on a basic claim in the Book of Mormon, that Native Americans are somehow related to a lost tribe from Israel who emigrated to the Americas 2,600 years ago.

In "Losing a Lost Tribe: Native Americans, DNA, and the Mormon Church," research scientist Simon Southerton of Canberra, Australia, states that American Indians and Polynesians appear to be of Asian extraction, noting that none of the nearly 7,500 DNA-tested Native Americans shows any link to ancient Israel. This conclusion has also been reached by many other scientists studying mitochondrial DNA lines.

The debate, which has been raging for years, is less about the ancestral origins of Native Americans, and more about how it affects basic beliefs of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as expressed in the Book of Mormon. Simon Southerton, a former member of the LDS church, feels that church leaders should just own up to the problems with some of the literal teachings in the Book of Mormon, given the current results of DNA research. "They should come out and say, 'There's no evidence to support your Israelite ancestry,' " Southerton said in an article in USA Today. "I don't have any problem with anyone believing what's in the Book of Mormon. Just don't make it look like science is backing it all up."

The ultimate in appalling: The curse was laid on some of the ancient Americans to procure purity for others, shielding the poor, weak, suggestible, susceptible, righteous ones from bad examples and influences which, as divinely favored, pure descendants and followers of Nephi, they were powerless to withstand.
...wherefore, as they were white, and exceeding fair and delightsome, that they might not be enticing unto my people the Lord God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them. (2 Nephi 5:21)
Far too many people back in 1829 when the Book of Mormon was first published believed that black Africans had the curse of Cain upon them, which was interpreted by them to be black skin. (Genesis 4:15)

This part, consequently, is somewhat understandable in terms of the racist U.S. culture of the time. But the part about "not be enticing"? Only an author who expected readers to be so wooly headed they'd pull the wool over their own eyes could have written such a preposterous thing, and to attribute it to an omniscient Lord God is the ultimate blasphemy.

How could all those half-breeds, mixed-bloods, mestizos, métis, mestiços, mulattos, etc. be so invisible back in the 1820s? Whole regions (whole nations nearly) of part-Spanish Indians had come into existence, not to mention numerous part-Portuguese, part-French, part-English, and part-Dutch. Not enticing? And their "cursed" off-spring not enticing? Oh, man! This is just too much! Oh, but the curse had to do with not being enticing to Nephites! Spanish, Portuguese, British, etc.... They are something else!

Joseph Smith, Jr., as may be adduced from the above, was either a stranger to enticement or impervious to it and must have practiced polygamy solely as a matter of principle. Well, yes, he may have known about enticement conceptually. In Mosiah 20:1-5, the reader is treated to an episode in which the wicked priests of Noah laid and watched twenty and four* of the daughters of the Lamanites gathered together to sing and dance and carried them off into the wilderness.

*Re: twenty and four: Exaggeratedly scrupulous precision is a hallmark of genuine, certified fraud. About how many times do we encounter anything this precise in everyday life? About 23.67 out of every 24? But twenty and four sounds biblical. Twenty-three of the daughters of the Lamanites? Twenty and three? About twenty? Around thirty? Forget it! Four and twenty? Smacks of "black (Lamanite) birds baked in a pie." Watch for a parody of this precision as Pérez continues on.

The wicked, libidinous priests were Nephites—those not cursed who remained exceeding fair and delightsome;* the Lamanites were the despicable dark-skinned ones. Hey, wait a minute! Hadn't these "daughters of the Lamanites" been cursed to not be enticing to the Nephites? What is going on here? The Lord God Almighty's decree was of no effect? Blasphemies piled upon blasphemies. Nonsense upon nonsense.

*And righteous? Judging by the looks of things, it would appear that "God's" divine curse didn't work, miserably failing in its purported purpose to perpetuate the purity of the exceeding fair and delightsome Nephites! No. It didn't work. Except for Moroni, all ye fair ones ended up being destroyed because of their wickedness. (Mormon 6:19) Let this be a word of caution to all ye fair and delightsome ones out there. Ye know who ye are.

A prominent prop-upper whose eyesight tells him that Native Americans are neither "redskins" nor "blackskins" avers that the Israelite leader who brought these migrants to America must have been trilingual in Hebrew, Egyptian and Arabic, wherefore "skin of blackness," he assures us, is to be interpreted symbolically. (To Egyptians, he informs us, black symbolized evil.) Oh, great! So God cursed them to be evil! So much for freedom, for free will! (Since Cumorah, Hugh W. Nibley, Deseret Book Company, 1976, pp. 246-248)

No, no, no, no, no! They became evil as the result of their own actions!
But "God did cause," the words plainly say. Do words have meaning or not? And if it was only a symbolic "skin of blackness"—not literal—how come these "exceeding fair and delightsome" people from out of "the land of Jerusalem" were dark-skinned when Columbus and others arrived? Wiggle out of that one!

What a miasma! Malodorous, noxious and vile! So millions of adorable little Native Americans like the many that Eduardo has loved and cradled in his arms are carriers of a curse! As a mestizo, Pérez must be a carrier too, for "thus saith the Lord God: I will cause that they shall be loathsome unto thy people, save they shall repent of their iniquities. And cursed shall be the seed of him that mixeth with their seed; for they shall be cursed even with the same cursing. And the Lord spake it, and it was done." (2 Nephi 5:22-23)

The "Lord" spake very plainly and unequivocally (Who can doubt it?), but if those cursed dark skins have been so damned enticing, why have no great waves of repentance been reported? And why are Mormons.... whether exceeding fair and delightsome or just so so.... so loath to repent of the iniquity of believing this loathsome fiction?

Oh, hearken, all ye light- and dark-skinned ones alike to the gist of Smith's inspired, inspiring prophecy: Repent therefore all ye loathsome sinners of mixed and unmixed seed and... Behold, oh behold your great reward!... Suddenly, miraculously, ye shall be as before; i.e, white, exceeding fair, delightsome, and enticing!* to right-skinned predators who have callously sexually abused, misused and plundered you divinely-mutated wrong-skinned "remnants of Israel" for centuries. (See 3 Nephi 2:15—all versions until recent times, when white miraculously became pure!)

*Mormon missionaries among Mexicans in Pérez's youth kept a close eye on recent "Lamanite" converts after their baptism, fully expecting to see them gradually turn white and exceeding fair. Some young elders—and elderly ones, too—were all too often heard to say, "They're getting whiter all the time!" Yes, concupiscence, so vital and necessary for the perpetuation of humanity, refusing to lie dormant, can miraculously make all shades of skin exceeding fair and delightsome. To one young elder, many years ago, the color of feminine "Lamanite" skins was utterly beautiful, stunning and alluring exactly as it was, and he wouldn't have wanted it changed for the world or for the life of him.

So who are the accursed ones in this story? The Nephites, obviously. Cursed to despise others, contemptuously considering them filthy and loathsome, merely because of the color of their skin. Joseph Smith, Jr. is accursed too for propagating such filthy, loathsome, vile poppycock.

With respect to "filthy," Native Americans have traditionally bathed frequently. By contrast the European conquerors considered bathing injurious to their health and risked immersing themselves in water perhaps once a year—typically in June, when the water of streams and ponds warmed up. Those all too often once in a lifetime baths have left us an enduring legacy: the popularity of June weddings. Ironically, "odor of sanctity" was a joking reference to all those unwashed bodies assembled for mass with their unpleasant, offensive smells. A great sight to see is the swinging of the Botafumeiro dispensing clouds of incense in the great cathedral of Santiago de Compostela in Spain—to mask those smells.

Some Mormon revisionists now assert that other peoples besides the Nephites and Lamanites were co-inhabiting this hemisphere with them. Yes, yes, Asiatics, too, and intermingling with them would account for the Lamanites' loathsome dark skins.* It was a simple, ordinary, natural process, you see. Nothing divine or miraculous about it, you see. You see? Sure... So much for what God himself  "spake" according to "the most correct book on earth": "...the Lord God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them... And the Lord spake it, and it was done."** (2 Nephi 5:21,23)

*Please, please, dear Asian friends. I didn't say this. I would never say such an irredeemably repugnant thing.

Loathsome? Every mother who dearly loves her precious little ones and all who truly love others know that any so-called scripture made up to masquerade as divine, its holiness established beyond doubt by an unholy number of wholly holy archaisms dating back beyond 1611 like lo, behold, yea, ye, thee, thou, thine, verily, and unto the Holy Ghost, O house of Israel, wist not, listeth not, durst not, thus saith the Lord, sheweth himself, it behooveth him, mixeth, thus saith the Lord of Hosts, And it came to pass, God hath, hast thou, thou didst, livest, O ye fair ones, doth, seemeth, goeth, thou shalt, putteth his trust, thus saith the Lord God, and by an unholy curse laid on some of God's children, their children and all who "mix their seed with theirs" to have a skin of blackness and be loathsome, is too unadulteratedly bogus and evil to be paraded before the world as the word of God.

** "And the Lord spake it, and it was done." Picture this, if you can: Laman and Lemuel and their families suddenly detect a change in their skin coloration from exceeding white to exceeding black. (In current editions of the Book of Mormon, white having become pure, they suddenly became impure!)

"What's going on?" they ask themselves. "How amazing!" says Laman to his wife. "You look the same as ever except for that mysterious, stunning, erotic new cast to your skin! And look at our daughters! More strikingly distinctive than ever! What could have brought this upon us? Obviously a blessing, not a curse or a punishment. Precious, adorable little baby Abish here won't reach the age of accountability for seven and a half more years, so.... Won't we be punished for our own sins, not those of our fathers and others? No way could it be for the sake of pitifully weak brothers! Good grief! Now those over-sexed, lecherous Nephites, as they call themselves, are going to lust after our women and girls more than ever!

"Scary, when you think of it. Us four sons of Lehi, the servant Zoram and Ishmael's kinfolk, we're all family. What will result from so much inescapable inbreeding? We'll end up as criminal and feeble-minded as the Jukes and the Kallikaks!* I'm glad our skin is actually tan, not black. That would be loathsome!

*Jukes and Kallikaks were pseudonyms for two families used as examples during the latter 19th century and early 20th century to argue that there was a genetic disposition toward anti-social behavior or low intelligence. The arguments were used to bolster advocacy of eugenics, or the "scientific" breeding of human beings, by demonstrating that traits deemed socially inferior could be passed down from generation to generation. As a general concept the Jukes Family represented inherited criminality and the Kallikak Family inherited mental retardation. Of course there is no truth in this relating to criminality. The usual question respecting what can be attributed to nature and what to nurture. Mental agility to nature—to DNA—but traits of character not.

"Know what? That's why a future prophet in a certain dominant culture will term this a skin of blackness. A skin of bronze, for instance, would sound too attractive, appealing, classic and noble. Know what? In the latter days us Native Americans may isolate our bronze gene, put the tanning salons out of business and make a fortune with it. Yes, I foresee a day when the white, exceeding fair and delightsome ones will seriously covet our chromatic complexion. No finer envious, unpremeditated compliment (therefore as pure as the whitest snow) could be paid us poor, unenticing objects of divine discrimination and segregation."

They ineludibly had to be denigrated (blackened, defamed). Oh, no! The N-word! Was there no other way to convey loathsome and filthy? Not in Smith's scenario. The prophet and seer couldn't have definitively established the incredible origin of the native American Indians—commencing a mere 2,600 years ago—in a more ludicrous, loony, holy scripture-aping, negrophobic, grotesque, disreputable, half-baked way.

Amazing how Mormons can swallow this baloney* and regurgitate it—turned like dogs to their vomit** to worshipfully, Pavlovily lap it up, conditioned to publicly tremble and sniffle as they testify to its celestial sublimity, for the Book of Mormon is the word of God... and true! Like the full scope of Smith's writings and doings from beginning to end: initialize to finalize. Initial lies to final lies.

*As I at one time did... Choke!... Gasp!... without batting an eye or wrinkling a nose or a brow.

Pérez's left little finger and right middle one were so shocked by the thought of his erstwhile naivety that they typed an "I" before he could stop them. ¡Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay! (Spanish pronounced I, I, I, I, I.) The narrative of his somewhat autobiographical roman à clef (a novel in which real persons are given fictitious names) was supposed to be from an exclusively third-person point of view.

**2 Peter 2:22, 3 Nephi 7:8 (Well, will you look at that! Saint Peter copied this right out of the Book of Mormon!)

So sad... They don't seem to get it. Don't want to. Yet roses—a great variety of them—miraculously can grow out of manure. Many could win first prizes at county fairs. The Just Judge knows to what extent their stems and roots have extended up into polluted air and down into contaminated soil inimical to full blossoming.

Innocence.... they have. Tenacity.... to glory in. A modest, unpretentious iota of perspicacity, too, and not one trace of righteous indignation over Smith's playing them for suckers with his holy fictions and scams. And we can't help but empathize with them and love them, even though they rely too much on borrowed oil for their lamps from the latest and best of farms. Manufactured, artificial stuff may be applied in problem areas but otherwise only pure organic—straight from their stable—is spread. (Some readers may realize that this is a pun on FARMS, Foundation for Ancient Research and Mormon Studies, sponsored by Brigham Young University).

Nephi wasn't mouthing a prophecy. He was stating a fact. "Was" was past tense in Smith's day and still is today, though Mormon revisionists would revise their own mother's mother tongue in a vain effort to make Smith's abominable nonsense make sense. But if all this revisionist intermingling took place as some now claim, can the Mormon prophets, seers and revelators identify which, if any, of today's tribes are pure Lamanites or perhaps half-breeds, quadroons, octoroons... or—could it be?—centroons or millroons? The truth is that Joseph Smith referred to all Native Americans as Lamanites. Check out "Lamanite" in the Index to Doctrine and Covenants and The Papers of Joseph Smith, Vol 1.

Two examples:
And thus you shall take your journey into the regions westward, unto the land of Missouri, unto the borders of the Lamanites. (Doctrine and Covenants 54: 8)

At this time a great desire was manifest by several of the Elders respecting the remnants of the house of Joseph—the Lamanites residing in the west... (The Papers of Joseph Smith, p. 324)
Do you understand this, FARMS? The tribes referred to were the Shawnees and Delawares, so voilà, you have got some indisputably authentic Lamanites. Check their DNA and compare it with that of all the other thousands of look-alike tribes and individuals and ascertain which, if any, have traces of Israelite DNA. The words quoted above from The Book of Doctrine and Covenants 54:8 were spoken by God himself! So there you have it. There can be no greater authority. Do it, FARMS! We breathlessly await a report of your findings.

If you doubt the validity of DNA findings, then simply go by the darkness of their skins and their level of loathsomeness. God's curse on them was still very much in effect in Smith's day and... you be the judge! Are they any whiter now? Keep in mind that "cursed shall be the seed of him that mixeth with their seed; for they shall be cursed even with the same cursing," so scrutinize their cursed physiognomy dispassionately and with the utmost objectivity. For don't you see? Half-breeds, mestizos, métis, etc. are cursed with the very same cursing, and therefore, unquestionably, are as thoroughly dark and loathsome as wholly pure Lamanites of unmixed seed.

WARNING! This curse is divine and so... lo... behold... without end. Take great heed therefore with whom you mixeth your seed! Ya wanna breed seed that's cursed and loathsome?
Behold, we are a remnant of the seed of Jacob; yea, we are a remnant of the seed of Joseph, whose coat was rent by his brethren... (Alma 26:23)

Then shall ye, who are a remnant of the house of Jacob, go forth among [the gentiles]; and ye shall be in the midst of them who shall be many; and ye shall be among them as a lion among the beasts of the forest, and as a young lion among the flocks of sheep,* who, if he goeth through both treadeth down and teareth in pieces, and none can deliver." (3 Nephi 20:16).

Therefore, repent [O ye Gentiles], and humble yourselves before [God], lest he shall come out in justice against you—lest a remnant of the seed of Jacob shall go forth among you as a lion, and tear you to pieces, and there is none to deliver." (Mormon 5:24)
So a Latter-Day Saint prophet, seer or revelator had better tell us who and where this remnant is right away lest it treadeth us down and teareth us in pieces!**

*There were no flocks of sheep in the Americas back then. Joseph Smith once expressed great interest in the "Navashoes," quite likely because they were reported to have flocks of sheep. These bovid mammals came to this hemisphere from Spain, introduced by the Spaniards shortly after their early explorations and colonizations. As for lions, the closest felines to them in America were cougars and jaguars, not known to "tread" on their prey.

**In the Battle of Little Big Horn, the Sioux did some treading on and tearing to pieces of Custer and his troops. Does this make the Sioux certified Israelites, a remnant of the seed of Joseph? Joseph Smith preached to the Lamanites and has so been depicted. The tribe or tribes so blessed most assuredly must not have been of Asiatic extraction or of a questionable admixture of seeds.

On the other hand, maybe we could repent so this remnant of the seed of Jacob won't go forth among us like a young lion. Don't bet on it, however. So help! H  e  l  p  , Mormon revisionists! None but you can deliver us from this imminent dire danger! Take up your brushes! Hasten! Before it's too late! Rush to the rescue! Quickly, now... Brush all intellectually honest interpretations of words that say what they say aside! Or gloss over, under, through, and around them! Or paint them in colors and ways least likely to occasion the raising of a single eyebrow or one small, timid, earnest question as the least perceptive and scholarly go through pitiful, shoddy, shabby, specious explaining-aways and both tread down on them and tear them to pieces!

On the other hand, maybe we don't need to repent. Wheww! What a relief! (Hold it! On utterly groundless grounds, that is. Besides, repenting just to escape getting treadethed upon is no true repentance at all!) One way or the other, you see, the loathsome skin of blackness problem that totally discredits Mormonism will not go away. Mormon prophets and apostles, you see, still righteously persist in calling Native Americans from the Antarctic to the Arctic "Lehi's children" and these words from the Book of Mormon have not yet been re-written:
"Wherefore, a commandment I give unto you, which is the word of God, that ye revile no more against them because of the darkness of their skins; neither shall ye revile against them because of their filthiness... and remember that their filthiness came because of their fathers." (Jacob 3:9)
These words were spoken right after Nephi's death. If Asians were responsible not only for the loathsome skins of blackness but—now added to this—their filthiness, no mention of such an undesirable race and its disgusting, sickening seed is made by Jacob or anyone else. Who were these fathers? Laman and Lemuel. By what name are they known? Lamanites.

Oh, well... O.K., have it your way, Mormon revisionists. So the poor, weak, suggestible, susceptible Nephites were heart-rendingly, helplessly, defenselessly exposed to the vile, irresistible enticements of the white and exceeding fair and delightsome Lamanites by a negligent, thoughtless, unfeeling, callous God until finally, with awesome good luck (surely within a century or two), Laman and Lemuel's posterity encountered some Mongoloids (who carefully kept well clear of Nephi's folks, mortally afraid that some of their daughters might gather together and sing and dance) and to the choked-up, quivering relief of the despairing, inhumanely enticed Nephites got their seed abhorrently dark, loathsomely and filthily mixed.

So the yellow peril* that so terrified the white Anglos who inhabited "the land northward" many centuries later was actually a blessing to the Nephites, preserving their racial and spiritual purity far better than modern contraceptives could right down to their final extermination at the Hill Cumorah. (Virile white Spaniards to the south considered all methods of birth control unnatural, including skin color hang-ups and abstinence.)

*The alleged danger to the supremacy of the white, or Caucasoid, people when a vast influx of Chinese flooded into the U.S. to build railroads, Japanese were imported to plant, cultivate and harvest crops in Hawaii and California, and Filipinos and other Asians came to work at disdained low-paying jobs. These perilous people typically are so hard-working, law-abiding, educated and admirable that it is an honor to be their fellow citizens.

Well... Mormons still don't get it. Don't want to get it. But put any way they like, in the light of the Gospel, the light of truth—meddled with or not, however it's peddled—this racism is so unmitigatedly ugly and trashy it will forever be viewed as loathsome and filthy. Yet... Never an apology, never a retraction, a recantation. Pay attention, God-fearing Latter-Day Saints: Without absolute dissolution of your publishing operations and the dissemination of The Book of Mormon and other sacriligeous, mendacious fictions, there will be no absolution from your blasphemous offenses to God and mankind!

If perchance they ever do catch on, they could sing a new song to the tune of "Hail to the Prophet, ascended to heaven":  Hell to false prophets, descended to Hades.

Where do Mormons think false prophets are going to end up? Do they want to blissfully share their fate? Do they expect to get brownie points with God for following after them?

It is said that ignorance is bliss. If the prophets, seers and revelators' selective ignorance is crucial to the realization of perceived lofty goals, then doses of charity might not be amiss. Yet, if they never question for one second, never employ their God-given gift of reason, never doubt, never seek, never ask, never knock, then what will be opened to them?

Other legs likewise can support no weight. Not one ounce. According to the Book of Mormon, "The Church of Christ" once flourished in America. "The people were all converted to the Lord, upon all the face of the land, both Nephites and Lamanites, and there were no contentions and disputations among them, and every man did deal justly one with another." (4 Nephi 2) For over 200 years "there were no envyings, nor strifes, nor tumults, nor whoredoms, nor lyings, nor murders, nor any manner of lasciviousness...." (4 Nephi 16) [Wow! The Millennium had already come way back then!]

Yet when the Genoese adventurer Christofero Colombo and other explorers arrived, not one single Messiahan was to be found upon all the face of the land! The Messiah had appeared to their ancestors and a great change had been wrought in them which endured for an incredibly long period of time and yet by 1492, nothing! The power of the resurrected Messiah's presence and his message ended up so paltry in the end that not one single descendant of those unbelievably pious and pure ancient Americans kept the faith! Nor was even one heretical apostate perversion of it carried forward.

The appearance of the Messiah to his "other sheep" in this hemisphere is considered by Mormons to be the most beautiful and touching of all Book of Mormon historical accounts. In reality, it's a farcical counterfeiting of New Testament scripture. Transposing Old World events to a New World setting poses a few difficulties. For example, with no sheep or wine in the New, what could an imaginative but unknowledgeable young "translator" do? Just blunder through? Trust his all-holy thys and thous to overshadow all wholly honest and objective investigations into the whys and hows?

Although in Jerusalem the Messiah permitted only doubting Thomas to thrust his hand into the wound in his side, in "the Land Bountiful" a great multitude* was allowed not only to thrust hands into his side but also to feel the prints of nails in his hands and feet—yea, "one by one until they had all gone forth."

*Just three plus eight witnesses (like those who beheld and even hefted the gold plates) would not do. A vast multitude was required. With reference to Oliver Cowdery, Martin Harris et al, it is an article of faith among Mormons that these noble souls would never lie. Did not lie!

Think on it! If Oliver admitted to lying or being a knowing party to fraud and deception, goodbye good repute and law practice! Far better for him and the other witnesses to pass as confused, mesmerized or victimized, but liars? Never! Also, much better to bask in glory among Mormons at a later date by remaining valiant, firm, steadfast and constant like Martin! True, in today's world (The facts speak for themselves!) it is very difficult to conceive that any man might perpetrate or tolerate fraud or deceit.

Could money have been a factor? From his early employment as a seeker of hidden treasures by means of a peep stone in his hat down to present-day "Tithing Settlement," Joseph Smith set in motion a formidable cash machine. Oliver no doubt recognized Smith's plan for a church as a money-making scheme and quite likely bought into it with his declarations.

To assure that the last drop is milked from this cash cow, tithing settlement requires Mormons to settle up, and if they haven't paid a full 10% of their earnings, they will be denied temple recommends, barring them from access to the sacred washings and anointings (involving disrobing and touching), etc. which have disgusted people of high morals to the extent that they have fled the church or rebuffed its missionaries. Click here for some candid comments.

Just hearing a voice "as if out of heaven" and seeing what they saw with their own eyes would not do. After all, who hasn't heard a heavenly voice announce "Behold my Beloved Son" and then beheld a Man descend through the air to earth as recorded in 3 Nephi 11:3-8? No, no one would hastily draw premature conclusions from an introduction like this and just take the Man's word for whatever he was trying to prove. The proof had to be touchy feely, so the Son of God, the Lord of Creation, subjected himself to hour after hour of curious, wondering, marveling fingering.

Was it permissible to have someone hold your place in line if you couldn't hold your water any longer? Did entrepreneurial souls set up taco and atole stands? All told, there were "about two thousand and five hundred souls; and they did consist of men, women, and children." (3 Nephi 17:25) Allowing, say, 9.99 seconds for each soul (It would be unconscionably unseemly, improper, irreverent and impious to perform this sacred act more hastily), this adds up to six hours, 56 minutes, 15 seconds. Give each and every one of them a more significant, respectable, 30 seconds to feel and touch and we're talking over 20 hours.

Keep in mind that on the same day the Messiah gave lengthy instructions and teachings, including a repetition of the Sermon on the Mount—verbatim, except for an intrusive, repetitious, anti-poetic "all" (blessed are all they that mourn, blessed are all the pure in heart" etc.), whereby Smith performed the meretricious... oops! meritorious act of improving upon the Savior of the world's words)—in addition to healing all the sick and afflicted (figure an even 49 seconds for each of the sick; 41 seconds for each of the afflicted), blessing each of the little children present (allow five seconds per child) and administering a sacrament of bread and wine "brought forth" by his twelve disciples to the entire multitude.

No wine of the vine in Ancient America but, yes, ever popular pulque of the cactus. The only container mentioned is the figurative one in "the wine of the cup," though the Twelve must have had a real one each or perhaps a jug, as in "the pulque of the jug." Nephi records that the Messiah blessed and brake the bread (five tortillas?) and gave it and the wine of the cup to the Twelve, who ate and drank "and were filled" (while 2,500 hungry souls enviously eyed them). Then the Twelve served broken pieces of tortilla and 12 or so cups or jugs of pulque to the multitude until they too "were filled," which may have taken a while. (Don't expect men, women and children to rush it when offered their fill of free tortilla and pulque—especially the women and kids, traditionally not allowed one sniff or sip of the fermented juice of the maguey.)

This multitude got doubting Thomas's verification one by one, the Sermon on the Mount (plus additional ones), the healing of the sick and afflicted, the blessing of little children, a public open-air version of the Last Supper, the Multiplication of the Loaves and Fishes (minus fish but—better still—with pulque), the Multiplication of the Pulque (and of the Cups or the Jugs—one for every 25 souls or so, saving hours of time—or did the Twelve devote four or more hours to patiently and reverently serving about 208.33 souls each?), all in one day. Listen, you miserable, unbelieving skeptics, Nephi clearly states that this got started sometime in the morning and so what if it did go right on into the next day?

If you insist, but on that day "the multitude was so great" it had to be divided into twelve bodies—a day of sermonizing, baptizing, "truly" administering a sacrament of bread and wine to 12 times as many souls, it may be deduced, miraculously provided by nobody (Oh see how Smith plays one-upmanship with biblical miracles!), the ministering of angels from heaven, the quoting of the words of Isaiah and Malachi (For variety. And why should the Messiah—the Word!—speak words that others have already expressed far better than He could? Besides, putting words that aren't in the New Testament into the Son of God's mouth is no easy task!), and in fine the expounding by Jesus of "all things unto them, both great and small... from the beginning till his coming in glory"—though this was not "even a hundredth part of the things which Jesus did truly teach unto the people."

Hmmm. Let's see... More than one hundred times the two hours or so that can be inferred from Mormon's abridged account taken from Nephi's plates plus administering the tortilla and pulque to many times as many souls, baptizing untold numbers of souls, the ministering unto the multitude of the twelve disciples and of angels from heaven (Healing? Comforting? Encouraging? Not a clue, but certainly patient and kind, taking its hours of time), praying, quoting from the Old Testament... That makes how many 12-hour periods of daylight in one day? Fifteen at the very least, one could reasonably calculate—those emphatic "trulys" having ruled out the slightest possibility of hyperbole.

Now it is true that Third Nephi knew shorthand and that his plates "do contain the more part of the things which [Jesus] taught the people," but it is expedient, Mormon says, to include in his "small abridgment" only the "lesser part of these things." Whewww! Thank you... er... uh... Thank thee, Mormon, for getting Smith so superbly off the hook! There are limits, you know, to what can be plagiarized. Morality and society condemn wanton, willful thievery of others' words and works.

Admittedly, Smith's restraint is noteworthy and praiseworthy, putting into the Lord's mouth only a "lesser part" straight out of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John and honorably resisting the temptation to invent a "more part." But what a let-down! Couldn't we at least get a tiny whit or two of "the more part," affording at least one tiny clue or two as to why certain words of our Lord (all of which are precious and of more worth to us than all the world's silver and gold) would not be expedient? If not expedient for us, how so for those Ancient Americans? How inconsiderate to make available to the world in these latter days only a lesser part of these things!

Quite aware of the fact that limiting himself to nothing more than a stark plagiarizing of passages from the New Testament would be perceived as a crude scam by even the most simple-minded, Smith came up with the brilliant idea of a "small abridgement" and some clever fancy footwork with "expedient" to dance around his total inability to invent a few words even one hundredth of a whit close to resembling anything the Son of God might have said.

Scammeister Joseph Smith made several other necessary improvements on Old and New Testament scriptures, thereby making it crystal clear, providing irrefutable proof, that he was not plagiarizing the Bible but truly translating into King James English (extinct as an everyday vernacular at that time except among the Quakers) from golden plates delivered to him by the Angel Moroni. Undoubtedly Joseph had a better command of the thees and thous than contemporary Mormons, however, who are prone to say as they address congregations of ordinary mortals, "I say these things in the name of thy son Jesus Christ. Amen." "I say these things... Way back in time, some verbally gifted individual uttered this gem and it was so extraordinarily, incredibly brilliant, devoted copycats have been repeating it ad nauseum.

Many examples could be given of the fierce devotion that Messiahans have had to their faith from the very beginning, hiding in the catacombs, thrown to lions, crucified upside down, they nonetheless persevered. Yet we are expected to believe that every last one of these Book of Mormon super Messiahans was annihilated, that none took refuge somewhere in two vast continents where they could hold out and endure till the Age of Discovery. Where is the evidence that they ever existed at all? In the Old World, evidences of the continued existence of Messiahans from earliest times down to the present day are everywhere.

An exceeding easy thing to believe: All surviving white, non-loathsome Nephites on two vast continents* were destroyed in the last great battle of Cumorah! (Save only the future angel Moroni.) So quite conveniently, when the Europeans arrived not one single whitey could be found!

*Pérez was truly, sincerely, honored to serve as translator for LDS Pres. Spencer W. Kimball on several occasions in Chile. Eduardo deeply loves that land and was excited to hear Pres. Kimball announce that Lehi had disembarked on the Pacific coast just north of Viña del Mar. So from that point the trajectory went forward to a tragic denouement some thousand years later at the Hill Cumorah in upstate New York. Therefore, the assertion "two vast continents" is not made lightly.

Practice exercise for exam on Part 1.

1. Xristos
a.  is a Latin translation of Hebrew Meshiach.

b.  is a Greek anagram meaning fish* a secret symbol with which early
      Christians identified each other in perilous times.

c.  is a translation of Meshiach and means "the anointed one" in Greek.

*ichthys (transliterated to English) is the Ancient and Classical Greek word for "fish." It refers to a symbol consisting of two intersecting arcs, the ends of the right side extending beyond the meeting point so as to resemble the profile of a fish, said to have been used by early Christians as a secret symbol—an acronym (or backronym) of "Jesus Christ, God's Son, Saviour."
ancient Christian symbol

Societies of Christians in the early Roman Empire protected their congregations by keeping their meetings secret. In order to point the way to ever-changing meeting places, they developed a symbol which adherents would readily recognize, and which they could scratch on rocks, walls and the like, in advance of a meeting. At the time, a similar symbol was used by Greeks to mark the location of a funeral, so using the ichthys also gave an apparent legitimate reason for Christians to gather. Another story suggests that the ichthys was used as a sort of secret handshake: one person would draw with a staff, or even a leg a single curve, (half of the ichthys) in the sand, and another person could confirm their identity as a Christian by completing the symbol[citation needed]. Alternatively, one would draw the symbol, and another person would confirm their faith by drawing an eye on it.